Scott, the main figure in M. E. Kerr’s humorous story
“I’ve Got Gloria,” exhibits a number of memorable character traits, including the
following:
- Gutsiness:
Scott shows that he is gutsy (or daring) when he calls up his math
teacher, whose dog is missing, and pretends to be a kidnapper who is holding the dog for
a thousand-dollar ransom. As Scott phrases the ransom
demand,
“A thousand dollars, Mrs. Whitman. A thou, in
one-hundred dollars bills, and Gloria will be back drooling on your
lap.”
- Vindictive:
Scott shows that he is vindictive (that is, desirous of vengeance) when
he hears the teacher’s shocked reaction to his ransom demands and then thinks to
himself:
Got to you, didn’t I? Did your stomach turn over
the way mine did when I saw that F in
math?
- Sarcastic:
Scott shows that he is sarcastic not only in the sentences just quoted
but also when he reports how his teacher sounds when she responds to his demands.
Instead of sympathizing with her, he is somewhat
contemptuous:
Mrs. Whitman whined, “I just
don’t have a thousand dollars. I don’t know where I’ll get so much money either.”
[Emphasis
added]
- Mildly
menacing: Scott shows that he is mildly menacing when his teacher asks
him not to hurt her dog and he responds by
saying,
“Gee, what a shame that you have to worry about
such a thing. She’s a sweet little dog, and I know she misses you because she’s not
eating.”
Of course, all these
traits of Scott are presented comically, and they seem especially funny when we discover
that he doesn’t even have the dog. They become even funnier when, at the end of the
story, his teacher easily figures out that Scott is the culprit who has been harassing
her and when she also reports that he will have her as a teacher in her class during the
coming summer term. The joke, ultimately, is on Scott, but soon after the story begins
it is clear that Scott is the target of the author’s gentle mockery. Scott is not
nearly as scary a figure as he wishes he were.
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